How to deal with separation

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  • How to deal with separation
  •  How to deal with separation from children
  •  How to deal with separation with no contact
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How to deal with separation

Each breakup is ultimately unique, yet there are a few issues that are more common. When you breakup with your significant other, children are most likely to be involved. If things go south with your breakup you will most probably want to separate with your spouse. In such a scenario, you might in one way separate with your kids or maybe your spouse may need to move out. So when that happens how do you deal with separation having your kids in mind?  In this post I’ll taech you how to deal with separation. Be it with your children or any other kind of separation with or without contact.

Let’s get into it!

How to deal with separation


1. Separation with children

How to deal with separation from children

As soon as children are involved, it is MUCH more important to deal with a breakup as well as possible.

The children are already suffering from the whole situation. If mom or dad collapse completely or constantly argues with each other, it is terrible for the children.

At the same time, you should always be honest with your childrenThere’s no point in pretending something to them. They can see exactly what’s going on with you.

So instead of trying to hide your pain, your anger, your sadness or whatever from the children, try to deal with your separation well with the help of my instructions!

Here are a few special tips for separating with children:

  • Talk to your children and explain to them – depending on their age, so that they can understand – what you are feeling. An honest one: “Mom is sad because Dad is no longer there.” Helps a child more than an evasive one: “It’s all good.” , Even though the tears are rolling
  • Give your children a sense of love and security even more than usual. You need to know now that the breakup does NOT mean that YOU will leave as well
  • Assure your children that they are not to blame for the breakup! Even if they don’t say it, many children feel guilty and carry it with them for life
  • NEVER try to scold your ex-partner in front of your children! Even if it is difficult … Use the writing method instead (tip no. 4)
  • It should actually be a matter of course: Children are NOT any leverage! Never try to turn your children against your partner
  • Don’t be afraid to seek out family counseling or similar support. A separation is stressful for everyone involved and it is not a shame if you get help in the interests of your children!

The only situation in which you can cover up your feelings is inevitable encounters with the children.

A complete break in contact is hardly possible with children together. At least try to be as calm, objective and friendly as possible in these moments and instead reduce the meetings to a minimum.

Arguments, reproaches, or even tears have lost nothing in front of the children!

Also read :25 gratitude questions to spark new ideas

2. Separation despite regular contact

How to deal with separation while having regular contact

A separation can generally be processed easier and faster, the less you see each other afterward.

Of course, that makes it all the more difficult when you have a common job or business together, bump into each other every day at school or university, or have a lot of mutual friends. Sometimes it is not possible to move directly to separate apartments for financial or organizational reasons …

The same applies here:

The faster you reach the 5th phase of separation – acceptance – the better. Because only in this phase are you able to deal with the other halfway normal again.

Until then, you should try to find an interim solution. Be too good for the other kind of gets out of the way.

Here are a few ideas:

  • If you are a colleague: talk to your boss. Explain the situation to him and ask that you be physically separated, if that is possible, or at least not given any joint projects
  • In a joint business, it can make sense to split up your working hours for a while so that you only have to make arrangements
  • You can’t always avoid the other at school or university … But try anyway and don’t deliberately stay where you can constantly watch the other person
  • In the mutual circle of friends, you should be careful not to meet each other for a while. Also try not to involve the mutual friends in your separation by inciting each other against each other
  • In the case of a shared apartment, it makes sense to retreat to separate rooms and possibly even agree on usage times for the kitchen and bathroom in order not to constantly meet.

Also read: How to overcome the fear of rejection; 5 ways


All of these measures may seem exaggerated or you may find it totally difficult to avoid contact … Therefore keep in mind that they WILL HELP you to overcome the pain of separation faster and to suffer less!

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  •  How to deal with separation
  •  How to deal with separation from children
  •  How to deal with separation with no contact
  •  How to deal with separation with contact

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